The school year is at a close and my husband and I have been talking a lot about our take away from this year.
For me it’s been a tough year. It’s been filled with personal, parental and professional challenges that have truly pushed me to my limits. My thought has been what could I possibly take away from this year, other than relief that it is over? As we reflected I came to realize I have gained one amazing truth from this difficult year, my strength comes from the Lord!
Of course, the flip side of this is that I am utterly nothing without Him.
In my old life, I held a lot of pride in my ability to get things done!
In my mind I could always “do” enough to be find success in my work life <not even close to true this year>. I never thought I’d struggle with mental health issues… forgive me but I actually thought panic attacks were people being dramatic <I learned the truth the hard way>. I thought I’d power off every last pound of baby weight in no time and look like a rockstar <I still have 10 pounds to loose>. I thought I was a good wife <not after going 11.5 months with no more than 2 hours of sleep at a time>. I thought I was so very patient <11.5 months no sleep, 4 toddlers/3 days week, 14 crazy 3rd graders/2 days a week…. let’s just say I’ve raised my voice a few more times than I’d like to admit this year>. I thought……and the list could go on…
I suppose if we aren’t able to humble ourselves in the sight of God, as he calls, He so graciously gives us the chance to find humility…the hard way…. <thanks but no thanks>
In my place of defeat I have truly been met with His gracious strength. I haven’t found “success” per say in these areas but in so many areas I have gained a peace. I have received a miraculous kind of peace through the knowledge that I am His. He walks with me and if I never get anything else right again He will still be with me.
Meeting your limit may be exactly the where He wants you. In short, I think God is calling us in His subtle, thru the mess way to find yourself in Him. When this truth becomes real in your heart- being a hot mess or not measuring up to whatever stereotype you are comparing yourself with- becomes much more bearable- and if you are a Mom of young ones, it may just be all that could be expected!
So my prayer is, if you face a challenge, reach out in faith, He will meet you there and offer some beautiful super strength.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.